New Year, New Me

I know when you read the sentence you rolled your eyes and thought here we go. It’s not even the new year yet and I’m already hearing the ‘New Year, New Me’ statement. Yes I know this saying has been labelled the cliché of the century but even if it is. If you truly mean it, it doesn’t matter. Let it be a cliché that counts.

If you leave 2016, enter into 2017 and make the same mistakes you made in previous years. You are honestly wasting your time. Sometimes when we make mistakes that create set-backs we consider those mistakes to be wasted time. Nonetheless, if those mistakes taught you something. They are actually lessons that will sky rocket your progress to the point that those set-backs become the best thing that ever happened to you. However, if you do not learn from these mistakes and continue to have the same mind-set, attitude and behaviour that landed you in that sticky situation in the first place that’s when the set- back and the mistakes made become a result of wasted time because rather than it having a temporary effect it will eventually have a long term effect because it has become a habit rather than a trial that you once struggled with and overcame.

So what I’m trying to say is that if the cliché ‘New Year, New Me’ is used as a statement that motivates and inspires you to eliminate bad habits and exhibit a good character. Then scream it from the roof top and put it into practise. I say put it into practise because the saying is usually perceived as meaningless because those who say it fail to practise it. As a result, it becomes a product of lip service. Which leads to more disappointment and downfalls. For the reason that, if you keep doing the same thing you will keep getting the same results. 5 X 5 isn’t 25 one day and 10 the other day. Therefore, if you keep eating junk food 3 times a day. KFC for breakfast, McDonalds for lunch and a light dose of Burger King for dinner and you keep putting on weight. Don’t think ‘ahhh I said new year new me, it’s 2017 so surely if I keep enjoying my life and following the same routine filled with junk food I will loose all that weight”. I know that’s a crazy example but you get my point right? Don’t maintain habits that produce bad results, avoid them. However, identify habits that you developed in 2016 that you feel really helped you and aided you in your success. Once you identify them continue to display and act them out. And as you enter into 2017 captivate and develop new habits that will cause your progress to be inevitable.

So use the next few days of 2016 to reflect on what you did right, what you did wrong and what you hope to do better in 2017. We all have so many goals for 2017. If you haven’t, get on that mate! Because 2017 is going to be an amazing year! And you don’t want to miss out!

Please follow my new site on abistake.com.

Happy new year guys! And I saw see you in 2017!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In 2017,

I will soar into new heights, new ideas, new success, good health, increased favour, increased anointing, breakthrough, excellency and multiplied grace! For I am who God says I am, I can do what God says I can do and I have what God says I have.

Legacy

Something handed down from one generation to the next.

What do you plan on leaving behind when you are dead and gone? Yeah I know, that is a bit of a crude and depressing question to reflect on, but it’s necessary. We must understand that we have to leave more than material things behind for the next generation to come. For the reason that, life does not consist of the abundance of what one has alone but the main source and purpose of life is the impact and influence one has had on their generation and the generation to follow.

So legacy can be classified as another term for inheritance. Now, another question I want you to reflect on is what is more infinite? The legacy of character or the legacy of wealth? Ok, let me explain. I believe that character is compatible with reputation. If you agree say Amen hunny! As Abraham Lincoln states “Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow”. What I interpret from this is that our character just like a tree is something that is nurtured and pruned. And this process for our character specifically begins from childhood as a result it becomes something that represents us. Even though it stems from within, it branches out and becomes an external representation of who we are. I will come back to that. Moreover, the second part of this quote basically formulates the imagery of our reputation being a product of our character as a result it looms over us and follows us wherever we go. Ok, so I am aware that the verb loom does connate that you are being stalked by your past but it essentially is the case, to be honest. So just a quick alert, be slow to act because sometimes it can come back to curse you or bless you. I’m just saying.

Ok, so back to my point. It could be said that legacy consists of the following components; Behaviour, personality and attitude. So let’s break it down.

Behaviour, the way you act or conduct yourself towards others. Are you respectful? Do you have the basic manners that consists of the words please and thank you? Do you look down on people because you think you are better off than them financially or due to your level of qualifications? Do you treat the CEO the same way you treat the cleaner? How do you behave towards others? Period, point, blank.

Personality, firstly do you even have a personality! Hehehe I’m joking. So basically what are the characteristics and qualities that you possess that makes you unique and causes you to stand out from the crowd. Do you stand out for good or bad reasons? Because don’t get me wrong you can be unique for a bad or good reason. Unique is being different y’all, its not always automatically a good thing. And finally, your attitude. There are many definitions for attitude but I’m going with the one that states that it consists of your thoughts and feelings therefore your moral and social standpoint.

All of these components that I have stated above are passed down to us like a baton from our parents. Now, obviously we are not robots and clones of our parents therefore we will develop our own personality and attitude. However, due to the training we receive from childhood a foundation is created. A foundation that no matter how much we try will always stand because remember “old habits die hard”.

Ok, so the point I am trying to get across is basically that we should not focus on the material things in life. Yes, we should strive for success and aim to ensure that we are able to leave an inheritance behind that will give our children a safety blanket. However, we must remember that material things will drift away but aspects like one’s character is infinite. And for that reason, we must spend our time on the things that will last forever. So you might be thinking, what are you expecting me to do now? I’m not dead or anything and I don’t have children yet. Well my advice to you and myself is that we should focus on nurturing our character, we should be humble and learn from our parents. Learn the good and leave the bad habits. So that we can continue their legacy and our children can carry ours on. Our legacy is our reputation.

 

Secure

What is the definition of security?

the state of being free from danger or threat

So today, I am going to be focused on the topic of security. This came up one day when myself and my dad were travelling to Leicester for something. Now, because we had to get there very early we left at like 5:30 in the morning. Therefore, it was very dark. And because it had rained the day before, the roads were extremely wet.

 

So, the majority of the journey was on the motorway. As the journey went on, I felt some tension in the car and I looked at my dad and he looked a bit strange. So I asked him ‘daddy are you ok?’ and he confessed that he does not fill comfortable driving on the motorway when the road is wet and it’s pitch black dark. This is because he always feels paranoid when all of these components are present. Moments later, lo and behold the rain started to pour! Can you imagine, when the timing is just on point right!

 

If I tell you, this journey became one of the quietest journeys ever. For the reason that my dad was so self conscious and had to concentrate. As a result, my dad’s anxiety made me very worried and on edge to the point that even though I was really tired. I couldn’t bring myself to sleep. For the reason that my dad is never paranoid or nervous about anything, so I was not use to getting that kind of energy from him.

Anyway, so you might be thinking. What is the point of this story? Well the point is, we must appreciate those in our lives that have provided us with some kind of serenity in our lives. Whether it be emotional, financial or mental security. We must appreciate them. This is because, it wasn’t until this event happened that I realised that sometimes I depend on my dad’s peaceful nature. And for that reason, I was filled with so much gratitude towards him.

Sometimes it’s easy for us to take our loved ones for granted because we are always around them. But please remember to tell your loved ones that you are grateful for their lives, what they do for you and that you love them and miss them when they are gone. Make sure they know this.

 

Peace and love,

Abi x

P.U.S.H: Prayer in Action

Have you ever asked God to help you pass an exam with flying colours when you haven’t even revised for it?  Have you ever asked God to help you get a job, meanwhile you haven’t applied for anything but you’ve enjoyed 3 seasons of Scandal in 3 weeks? Have you ever asked God for a miracle yet continued to doubt his omnipotence?

To be honest, I think we will be lying if we state that we are not guilty for at least one of these scenarios. But I’m here to let you know that it’s time to wake up and be proactive. It’s time to push, until, something, happens.

In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead

(James 2:17)

This is truly deep, because remember that “without faith it is impossible to please God” Hebrews 11:6. Nevertheless, without action you will not yield results. Let’s be real. If God did grant you success when you did not actively do anything will He be doing you a favour. Let me answer that, no. For the reason that “whoever spares the rod, hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them” Proverbs 13:24. Therefore, in order for us to learn vital lessons in life like; hard work, self discipline, perseverance, motivation etc. Sometimes God will leave you to fail because you failed to be obedient to His word and accompany action with your faith. As a result, he will teach you a life lesson.

Don’t ever say but I thought you said your “plans are to prosper and not to harm ” me. Jeremiah 29:11. Or you said that I should not “be anxious for anything but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let my request be made known to” you Philippians 4:6. And I did make my request known to you, but you let me down and broke your promise. Before you even utter those words or allow those thoughts to enter your mind. Evaluate your actions and consider whether or not you played your part. Remember that your faith in God’s word has to be accompanied by hard work and physical action.

I’m going to be vulnerable here. Over the past few months I have truly been learning a life lesson. I have come to the realisation that I was taking advantage of God’s promises. I was expecting so much from God yet failing to do my part. I lost sight of the fact that God and I are a team. And in the same way that I expect him to fulfil his promises over my life, he expects me to be obedient to His word. And sometimes, it’s so easy to fall into the trap of going to God only when you need something, to the point where it’s so hard to get out of that trap because it becomes a lifestyle. But something happened to me recently, I won’t disclose it yet because I don’t think its time.. but that situation will always serve as a reminder to me of how much I need God and how much I also need to roll up my sleeves rather than leave God to do all the work.

To sum it all up, when I’m talking about prayer in action. I am talking about working HARD but praying HARDER. Prayer is not the only variable in the equation. Don’t get me wrong, it is a key variable but so is hard work therefore action. Truly pray until something happens, and work until you see a change. Until you see progress. Until you see the results you are hoping for.

It’s not easy. But just keep praying until you see the results.  Don’t stop because you don’t see a change yet. Because remember that God’s timing is the best timing, not yours. So just because you don’t see any results, it doesn’t mean something isn’t happening. Just be patient. But be active in your patience. And you shall see results!

Choices

In life we have to make choices and decisions. We have to choose between yes or no, left or right, work or chill, sleep or wake up, lie or tell the truth, remain or brexit. The consequences of these choices we make can have long term effects whether it be relief or regret. They have an impending impact on us and our lives.

During our time in Ghana, we visited my mother’s pastor and he gave my sister and I a mini-sermon based on the topic of ‘choices’. He focused on 5 aspects that stuck with me and I feel like sharing with you guys. So let’s get into it:

  1. Put God first

The scripture that comes to mind when I think of this choice is Matthew 6:33

But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you

Keyword being “first”, don’t seek God because you have no more options and resources to depend on. Choose Him first because you want to and because you appreciate who He is. As a result, everything else that is dear and near to you e.g. your career, will be added to you. So we need to make a conscious decision to put God first on our priorities list. This is actually easier said than done. But it’s an inevitable decision that needs to be made.

 

2. Friends

 

Choose your friends wisely. Quality is better than quantity. My first blog post was on ‘the key characteristics of a good friend’. Check it out if you haven’t already. But when you are choosing people you would classify as friends, consider the following; does the friendship benefit you and encourage you to be the best version of yourself? Is the person loyal? Are they honest, real and open? Can you trust the person?

 

3. Where you live

 

Sometimes something as simply as where you live can have an influence on the amount of opportunities that are accessible to you. Additionally, it can work hand in hand with your safety. For instance, if the location you choose to live in is known to have a high rate of gun violence then I think you need to re-evaluate your living arrangements. Moreover, where you live can also influence future events like the upbringing of your child. For the reason that, a popular debate in psychology called ‘The Nature-Nurture debate’ states that an individual’s behaviour can be influenced by biological components like genes therefore nature or the person’s environment therefore nurture. This demonstrates that where you live can also possess a determining factor.

 

4. Career

 

Choose your career wisely. Don’t choose it because of how much money you would acquire from it, what people would think of you or because it’s the easiest option. Choose it because you know that it is the reason for your existence therefore you cannot imagine yourself doing anything else. Choose your career on the basis of how it’s going to enable you to have an impact on your community and generation through using the gifts and talents that you possess.

 

5. Life partner

 

Hmm. Choose love over lust guys. Yes you have to be attracted to your life partner. However, do not give attraction complete control. Ensure that this person is your best friend and companion. Ensure that they possess the attributes that will enable you both to grow together. Ensure that they have good intentions towards you and others. And ensure that they make you feel good. If any alarm bells are ringing, don’t ignore them, address them and fix them before it’s too late. Most importantly, don’t force compatibility. If you are not compatible, let it go. Don’t worry. There is truly someone for everyone. Don’t force it. Just be patient.

As you guys know, I am a Christian. So I believe the best thing to do when making these decisions is to ask God for guidance. But in general, we must take our time when making choices because they can have a ripple effect. So take your time, consider, reflect and decide.

 

Quote of the day

“We make our choices, then our choices make us”

Faith in every season

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.

Hebrews 11:1

It is very easy for us to claim that we have faith when things are going well and in accordance to our plans. But it’s difficult when you are facing trials or have reached obstacles that are hard to overcome. This is truly the point that your faith is put to the test. Let’s focus on the following words within this scripture; ‘confidence’, ‘hope’, ‘assurance’ and ‘do not see’.

1.Confidence

 

So what’s the opposite of confidence? Doubt. Now doubt and faith do not appear in the same equation. You can’t scream at the top of your lungs “with God nothing is impossible” Luke 1:37. Yet turn around and say ‘but’. No! When it comes to faith in God, forget about the what’s, the when’s and the why’s. Focus on the who. God is the who you are depending and relying on, so have faith in his infinite ability and don’t limit Him to the things of this world alone because remember He can do “exceeding abundantly above all that we think or ask” Ephesians 20:21. Therefore, even if you don’t have confidence in yourself, have confidence in God because he will not let you down.

2. Hope

 

Hmmm, it’s not easy to be hopeful when things seem to always go wrong or when your plans always seem to fall through. Have you ever heard the saying “if you don’t expect anything, you won’t be disappointed”. This is a pessimistic approach to life. But sometimes it can be the easiest and less painful option, just give up so you don’t get let down. However, just because things are not going according to your plan, it doesn’t mean it is not going according to God’s. Remember what God says concerning our lives “for I know the plans I have for you”, He knows them but we don’t. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you” He has our back and has great things in store for us, therefore all we need to do is trust Him. “Plans to give you a hope and a future”. Therefore be hopeful because there is a bright light at the end of the tunnel. Jeremiah 29:11

3) Assurance

 

Confidence in the promise. This is the attribute we should exercise when it comes to faith. For the reason that, it’s based on the idea that the manifestation of the promise, pledge or covenant made with God is guaranteed to happen. Therefore, the promise in Jeremiah 29:11 shouldn’t be something you chant like a robot but it should remind you of the promise that God has over your life. So be assured and confident.

4) Do not see

 

Faith is believing in something with all of your heart and soul, even though you cannot physically see it. However, you believe because God said it therefore He will accomplish it. Let the church say Amen! Ameeen! Nonetheless, this is the hardest part because as humans we are taught to ask for or present evidence. From GCSE times PEE (Point, evidence and explain). As a result, if there is no evidence we discredit it. For this reason, the people around you who don’t believe in God or don’t have faith, will look at you like you are crazy and try to discourage you. But don’t forget who you are serving. Don’t forget what God has already done, what He is doing and what He says He is yet to do. Instead ponder on these words as you wait patiently in faith:

My eyes have not seen it, by faith I receive it. It will manifest. It’s already done.

 

 

 

 

UniTakeover Take 3

  1.   Trust in God through it all

For the Christian readers of this wonderful blog, this first point cannot be emphasised enough. University comes with so many ups and downs. Whichever season you find yourself in whilst at university, just remember God is your strength and give thanks at all times. I can personally testify for His goodness even when I wasn’t faithful towards Him. This is a lesson I learned in my second year especially. Through my own fault I did not give myself enough time to prepare for my second year exams. So I found myself having just four weeks to do proper reading, write notes and revise for 6 big modules. This was because I had only focused on the lectures that were relevant to any assignments that I had, rather than prepping for everything as a whole. Anyway, with so much pressure and so much to do, I almost had a break down – I remember calling my sister telling her I was basically not going to do the exams and just re-sit the whole year (a bit dramatic I know), but she encouraged me and reminded me to do my best and believe God for the rest. And boy, did God honour the long days and shorts nights. The results were beyond my expectations.

2. Plan ahead

Tied very closely with the above point, planning ahead is essential at university. Give yourself enough time to get assignments and revision done in enough time so that you can also enjoy your life. A rule I stuck to religiously whilst at university was to always start assignments 2 or 3 weeks – depending on time I had – before the due date in order to have enough time to take my time to do research and write, as well as reading through the work thoroughly. This enabled me to always do my work at a steady pace and still enjoy the social aspect of university.

3. Discipline

It’s hard but you need to be disciplined at university if you want to do well. If you have a tonne of work to do, don’t sit there procrastinating. Even if you’re friends are pressuring you to socialise and you have a pile of work up to your neck, say no. They may have already done their work – and if not, even more of a reason for you to say no and encourage them to do work. If you are disciplined throughout with your work, finding time to socialise will not be an issue because you would already be on top. Work hard from the start, but learn to balance giving yourself a break and having fun with hard work. – Take time to understand and explore the material you’re being taught

Often time a topic is more interesting than what it appears to be once you begin to dig deeper. Taking time to understand the topics you’re taught will not only enable you to enjoy your discipline more, but will also make you stand out from your peers.

4. Make use of the resources you have

When I say ‘resources’, I include people in this category. Yes make use of your library, access to journal websites, archives etc., but also make use of peers, older students and lecturers. They may just enrich your knowledge and understanding in ways you wouldn’t expect. Don’t leave the ‘what am I going to do after university’ topic till after university. try to think about it during your time at university, especially in final year. Sometimes by the time final year comes (for some people this could be a few weeks into university), the plans we had prior to university would have changed. Instead of going along with the ‘i don’t know what I really want to do’ mentality, actively seek to find other areas that may be of interest to you. The sooner you have an idea, the more focused you will be. – Save money

If you can save money whilst at university, I would heavily encourage you to do so. it’ll help you so much with life after university, even if it means you have to cook more and eat less takeaway (that’s better and more yummy for you anyway – if you don’t know how to cook, it’s never too late to learn J).

5.Prepare yourself for many job interviews/ applications

Some people secure a graduate job after 1 interview, majority of others however, may only secure at several interviews/applications. My advice is to always stay focused and remind yourself of the passion you have you have for the role you’re applying for. Be prepared to accept rejection. Don’t however, let the rejection(s) keep decrease your morale or optimism.

Keep going, you will eventually get there!

Yours truly,

Kwirky Kwofie

Blog website: http://quirkykwofie.com/

 

UniTakeover Take 2

So I legit don’t know how to start this, please bear with me.

I guess let me start by saying I’m a third year student (Idonbilvit time does fly) studying Natural Sciences as an integrated masters’ undergraduate degree (4 years instead of 3).

I’ve been asked to give advice about progressing from second year to third year and I believe it’s best to share my own personal experience. DISCLAIMER: EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT BUT YOU CAN ALWAYS LEARN SOMETHING

From first year I was ignoring all those people who said “you only need 40%…first year does not count…blah blah blah”, NEWS FLASH!!! It counts and you will see how much it does in second year. I’m sure you’ve heard people saying things like how first year sets the foundation etc.

They’re right, it really does as the study habits, the way you manage your time and approach assignments and projects carries through to second year whether you like it or not. Second year counts, you can’t carry that “you only need 40%” attitude for a degree you’re paying 9 grand a year for…BRUH.

But here’s the flip side I personally had the mentality of second year counts and took it too seriously. In addition to my course during second year I was vice president of a society which is quiet a demanding role in itself. I was in the library 24/7during first term, when my mum called me 9 times out of 10 I was in the library, at times I would sleep in the library getting home at ridiculous hours, eating less, the whole shebang. Don’t get me wrong being in the library all the time is not the issue, the issue was when it came to exams the time I had spent (for me personally) was not reflected in the grades I got.

I was working hard and not smart. I was burning myself out.

This is one thing I would like to emphasise, make time to relax. I learnt this the hard way, as me not making time had a negative impact on my health (mentally and physically) which in turn had an impact on my academic performance.

Things had to change.

The defining moment for me was what I like to call the quote unquote intervention from my mum and god mum. They came down and had a chat with me; I had to set certain rules for myself and essentially learn how to work smart.

Ensuring you eat 3 times a day (the struggle is real in uni), setting aside time to relax whether it’s watching a movie or reading a book- just take a break, also personally for me relying on God more not just with my words but in my actions. These were very basic things but reminding and grounding yourself in the basics definitely helps.

I’ve mentioned working smart. I knew from A-levels how I took in information effectively, I had a method to the t on how to revise for exams. When it came to second year, with the amount of reading that needed to be done and the depth of the content I had to relearn the way I learnt. Don’t be surprised if you have to do this, it’s part of your growth. Keep reviewing to ensure you are not wasting time and energy. Learning to work smart by effectively taking in information maybe through videos or recording rather than mundanely taking notes upon notes (depending on the module) CHANGED THE GAME for me. I still spent time at the library but made sure when I went it was needed and work would be done effectively. Closer to exam period I would spend more time at the library but I would make sure I had to leave at a certain time to get rest.

Yes, second year can be challenging at times but you need to keep positive, keep things in perspective. I’m a Christian (shout out to G-O-D, father, son and holy spirit) and when I say God kept me sane, got me through and much more. BRUUUUH. There were times in my uni room where I would be crying to God, reading my Bible, praying, worshipping. God brought me through and keeping secure in His word really put things into perspective. For me my faith is everything and seriously please do not neglect God during second year. I learnt that yes people/ the world/ lecturers may say second year is the toughest year BUT what does Gods word say: I am more than a conqueror, He that is in me is greater than he that is in the world, I have the mind of Christ.

Tune out of the frequency of the world and into the frequency of heaven!

WOW! That was not meant to be that long but I hope you got SOMETHING from what I have written. I pray that as you progress into second year you will keep God first and remember your degree is in partnership with Him, I pray that God will do exceedingly, abundantly more than you can ask or think in your life and education in Jesus’ Name. AMEN!

This is advice given to you from a student going into third year. So tune into the next blog post from a blogger who is no longer a student and has finished it all!

From yours truly,

See Beauty In The Process x

Blog Website: https://seebeautyintheprocess.wordpress.com/

UniTakeover Take 1

Okay so, school season is now in full swing and it’s time for us all to hit the ground running. No procrastinating. No lazing around. Just being active and determined. Now I know this is easier said than done, but I don’t know about you but motivational/inspirational advise is what keeps me going and gives me a fresh perspective for the fast and approaching school year.

So for those of you who may not know, I finished my first year around late May 2016. Now, as usual people would ask me ‘how did you find it?’, ‘how was uni life?’. And many more probing questions but if I am being honest with you guys, I honestly don’t remember! Time truly flew past me like it was running for a bus it was about to miss. To those of you who take public transport you know how deep that is. So yeah here are a few tips I will give to those who are about to enter their first year:

  1. Don’t waste time

Time truly does wait for no man. If you are given an assignment which they usually give to you 4 weeks or more before the due date, even though you don’t have to start straight away. Start to plan, start to look for articles, texts and sources that will show your lecturers that yaaas this person means business. Give yourself a chance to really know what you are capable of and start from there. If you start it two days before, forget it. This is not a levels or GCSE’s. This is the foundation of your career so fix up and look sharp y’all.

2) Don’t listen to bad advice

The biggest lie I have heard is that 1st year doesn’t count. To a certain extent that is true, because it doesn’t count towards the classification of your degree therefore whether or not you get a 2.1 or a first. However, it does determine whether or not you will have a degree to begin with because you need to pass first year to actually make it to second year. So yeah, don’t play with this year too much. Not only does it determine whether you move on to the next step. But its also gives you an opportunity to grow, identify your strengths and weaknesses and also discover techniques that will cause your learning experience to be effective.

3) Ask for help

For those of you who are like me, asking for help is something I have struggled with all my life. I struggled and struggle with it for two main reasons. Firstly, I don’t want to bother anyone and secondly I like to be independent and figure things out for myself. BUT my gaash, in the middle of first year I realised that I needed some assistance. So I became proactive and changed my personal tutor first of all because my initial one was useless. I reached out to friends in the year above me and also my friends who were on the same course as me. As a result, I saw a huge difference in the aspects I once struggled with. So just humble yourself and ask for help when you need it. After all, we are all learning. And this is a learning experience, so make the most of it.

4) Enjoy!

There are sooo many fun aspects to uni life. The opportunity to be independent and discover who you are in the process, even library sessions can be mad once you have done all your work of course. So don’t worry about not making friends, you will. Just be yourself, don’t do things because you think everyone else is doing it. Be you and you will attract people like you or just people you jell with in general. Remember you only live once, so cease the moment. Cease it, because it truly is for only a moment. For real.

5) Put God first

It’s ironic that the most important tip I can give is at the bottom of the list. However, this is truly a reflection of how my priorities were in first year. I honestly neglected God and got so consumed with work and life. And I forgot who was my source of hope and strength. I understand that not everyone who reads this blog is a Christian. But I am, and God is truly the author and finisher of my life. As a result, when I neglected God I felt so empty and lost to the point where I was so down and depressed and had no more joy in my heart. So my advise to those of you who are about to enter first year is to put God first and remember that he will direct you and help you to get through all the difficult times. Because you truly cannot do it in your own strength. We all need help.

So guys, I hope this helps! All the best with first year! Enjoy it! Be patient. Be proactive and Be present!

This is advise given to you by a student going into 2nd year, so stay tuned and be inspired by the blog post given to you be student going from 2nd year into 3rd year.

Enjoy your day!

Yours truly,

Abi’s Take x

 

 

Why are you so negative?!

Yesterday my free will was taken away from me. Ok wait, saying that out loud I realise that may be a bit melodramatic but for those of you who do not know yet, I treasure the gift of free will given to us by God with every ounce of my being. So yeah, this is a big deal. This is actually not completely related to this post except from the fact that I am currently in a bad mood due to my free will being snatched out from my chest, ripped off my skin and stolen from my hands. Yes guys, it is that deep. Like I said. Every. Ounce. Of. My. Being.

But anyway, today I am focusing on negativity. Mainly focusing on why some people live and breathe it. What do I mean? I am referring to people who are unhappy in themselves therefore go on to find ways to deter others from their happiness. Some may call them enemy of progresses, haters or just people we avoid.

Before you exclude yourself from this category to those of you who may be thinking “naaa, she isn’t talking about me. She is talking about my girl Shaniqua” It has been proven that human beings, yes that means you and I, are more intrigued by and attracted to negative information. Can you imagine? Even though we as a people may aim to see the best in others, look on the positive side and detach ourselves from any component of negativity. It has been shown that we are more prone to recall and be attentive to negative information than positive information because we have been conditioned to do so.

Let me give a personal example. As a child I was very insecure in my physical appearance, mainly my skin complexion. I thought I was too dark. Even though I was surrounded by people who recognised my beauty and communicated it to me. I only believed one negative phrase that was said to me in my 2nd year of secondary school. You know that time when boys were only in your life to accomplish their mission, which was to destroying your self esteem.

Well yeah, this guy took the pleasure in telling me ” you are sooo dark, that’s why you edit all your pictures”. Now obviously as a feisty 12 year old I put him in his place and defended myself, because my parents did not raise a doormat. However, that comment still stung and bruised my self esteem all the way up to when I was 17 guys. I would say it was only until my last year of sixth form where I began to love myself and the colour of my skin.

One negative word discredited a pool of words of positivity and encouragement..

So let’s break it down. This is another topic that was revealed to me in my psychology lectures. Where it was revealed that the absence of negative information enables us to assume the best of others and form a positive impression however when negative information is present, according to Fiske 1980 we are biased to negativity. As a result it is easier to change a positive impression to negative as a result of subsequent negative information than it is to change a negative impression as a result of subsequent positive information.

Do you know why? Well firstly because, negative information is unusual and distinctive therefore it attracts our attention. Secondly, because it alerts us of potential danger as a result has survival value.

Now, my aim for this post is not to answer unanswered questions because I myself do not know. But my aim is to encourage us all to reflect. How can we move away from negativity to the point where we do not unconsciously become judgemental as a result because of ones mistake our impression of them is forever tainted. How can we learn to recognise that we are all flawed individuals who are learning, growing and evolving. Or how can we prevent discouragement from crippling our self esteem. Well I have an answer for that one, make sure you have self esteem in the first place and learn to love who you are so that such words would not have an influence on you. And finally, how can we ourselves monitor our character and recognise whether we feed into positivity and not negativity. Reflect on these, and make a change if necessary.

Lets cause positivity to win and avoid negativity. Whether it be what we think of others, what we say about others or our own thoughts about ourselves. 

Quote of the day:

“Negativity is the enemy of creativity”

David Lynch